The Bin.

Bella is messy, wildly messy, she leaves carnage in her wake and to make it worse she loves tiny toys which she collects up and then releases dramatically into the wildness of our flat. I can for the most part cope with the toys, the big issue I have is with food. As soon as she reaches a food she doesn’t want (crusts, a funny looking chip) or reaches the end of a packet of crisps for instance. She drops it on the floor. Not on her plate, or the table, not even passing it to me…it goes straight on the floor. This happens in our house, at school, in restaurants and it’s just not cool. 

As a single parent I’m not prepared to sit with her while she eats catching everything before it reaches the ground, I have stuff to do, and sometimes I’m eating at the same time so, y’know, priorities.

Every now and again I realise that I am truly and utterly stupid and I have these realisations which hit me like lightening bolts. Our kitchen has a stairgate on it to stop her from getting in and causing havoc. So, even if she knew to put her rubbish in the bin…how could she? It’s in the kitchen. This week I found an old toy bucket and put it in the living room and after she’d finished one of packets of crisps I (picked up the discarded crisp packet and put it in her hand) picked up the bin and said ‘in the bin.’ She obliged quite quickly, I was impressed and also happy that she didn’t freak out.

15 minutes later (don’t judge) she finished her second packet of crisps and LO AND BEHOLD she walked over and put the packet in the bin. Amazed wasn’t anywhere near what I was feeling. This summer her willingness to try and learn new skills has been fantastic. Her (usually titanium strong) will has been more flexible than I’ve ever known it.

The next day I carelessly handed her a packet of crisps in the kitchen and I watched her quickly vanish into her bedroom with them. Parent fail right there, but damn she is fast…and I was tired. Later I (having forgotten about the rogue packet of Worcester Sauce Walkers) wondered into the living room to find the empty packet in the bin. A day later. Unprompted. No reminders. Who is this child and what have they done with Bella, actually scratch that I’m happy with this one!

Who knew a bin could bring such joy!

The Bin 🚮

This is progress.

For too long Bella has ‘got away’ with having more done for her than she needs. Ok that might be a bit unfair but she is, in my opinion, capable of much more than she let’s on or that people give her credit for. I’ve made it my mission this summer to get her more independent and I’m starting with dressing. Everyday she is dressed and undressed as unlike her brother she shows no awareness of even really needing to wear clothes. She does go through phases where she only wants to wear Square Peg hoodies and zip ups but other than this I’m pretty sure if I let her she’d go out in just a nappy if I let her.  Continue reading “This is progress.”

Another beautiful trip


The Square Peg Caravan has changed our life. It has given me somewhere consistent to take my children and they just adore it. 

A long beach, but we got to the sea

Ice cream bigger than his head
Laughing together at the fair

The children know what to expect now and sometimes we even get some nice weather (well it is in Wales!) For more info on both of our caravans go to Www.squarepegfoundation.org.uk 

Square Peg Foundation is a charitable organisation 

Goals.

Raising children often turns into a competition, the first to walk, talk, wean, the first to read, SATs results and so on. When you’re parenting children with special needs these goals become obsolete, you either never met them or you start to slowly slip behind. 

Bella is exceptional in many ways, she can count and read beyond her years, she can pick out tunes on the piano with relative ease. She can do all this but can’t converse, can’t irritate me with questions like her brother. She can’t use the toilet, can’t play in the same way as her peers or indeed with her peers. 

Until her 16 month mark she was mostly hitting her targets, she walked, gurgled, clapped hands….then everything slowed down almost to a stop. The targets ever since have meant nothing. It’s time to redefine my own targets for her;

By the end of the summer she will be able to put on her own T-shirt ready for school. this will mean I only need to put her feet into her trouser as she can pull them up herself. Life skills are so important

.After that we’ll try socks which is something Logan still struggles with.

Speaking of Logan my goal for him is;

To learn to write the letter a. He gets so angry that he can’t write the penultimate letter in his name.

Just in time for school!

Log+n

Catch up…

So Logan officially graduated nursery (thank you USA for more mini celebrations) although he’s still there all summer at their playscheme so I’ve held back on his teachers gifts. When he leaves I’ll have been using that nursery continuously for 4 years. The staff have been more than amazing, they have supported me and my children far more than was expected and I’ll never find the words to thank them.  Continue reading “Catch up…”

Rock the boat

I received the letter I had been waiting for yesterday, it was the letter which followed the conversation with our social worker saying that the disability team panel had decided Bella and I weren’t in need of any support over the summer. I opened the envelope with trepidation, it was quite thick so I found myself a comfy spot on the sofa ready to plough through the pack. Actually what I got was one sheet of paper stating the names of panel members and a quick message that they had decided she “didn’t fit the criteria.” Continue reading “Rock the boat”